Since the question came up about giving bios for the lyst, I admit I'm not exactly for it but . . . .

Well, understanding that, for some strange reason, I may say numerous things that will contradict this later on (and may have said things in the past that don't fit with it), let me tell you about

Ellynne's 7

I am one of seven children. My older brother, Roj - er, Rob, was always getting us into trouble. _I_ saw nothing wrong with leaving the Powers That Be (like the babysitter) in peace (especially when the sitter was watching a really good SF show on PBS, even if it was one with really bad special effects). But this wasn't good enough for Rob. Oh, no. Rob was determined to strike a blow for freedom. Rob insisted on being peaceful and calm only long enough to get the sitter engrossed in the show. Then, we had to go sneak off and plan our attack. Needless to say, as second oldest (and, consequently, the only one who ever seemed to debate whether _Rob_ was the one who should be in charge - or whether there was any point to his revolution), I was always given the most difficult part of the attack (usually tackling the sitter in the legs, though it varied). Rob, as our commander in chief, generally waited till the sitter was down on the ground before really getting into it (the head, he told us, being the sitter's 'Central Command' is the most difficult part. Yeah. Right).

I admit, although the younger siblings were pretty tough (special mention for Cal - er, Cathy [her sports motto: "If you've got to foul out, make it worthwhile. They can't play if they've lost enough blood" (hey, you try adapting "companions for my death'" to a sports metaphore] and Sool - er, Linda Sue [she never said anything about blood, she just shed it]) but their blind devotion to Rob's attack schemes was a bit much.

Since Mom told me to drop the sweater issue, I will not comment about whether little sister Restal - er, Rachel has any thieving tendencies.

While not admitting to having any siblings named Del or Tarrant or anything like that, it is possible I could find a sibling taller than me with curly brown hair, depending on how you define 'taller,' 'curly,' and 'brown.' No comment on 'sibling' (not that I'm saying this sibling would ever date someone whose name started with Z, but you never know). I would like to add that any stories that we had a major rivalry over who should drive the Lib - er, Lincoln are just stories. We were never competitive. Honest.

We just had a lot of common interests and a limited number of toys. See the difference?

Anyhow, the peasants successfully overthrew the babysitter autocracy. Our parents started leaving us to babysit ourselves at an unspeakably young age (I would like to add that this was not negligent since we had already struck terror into a large portion of the local teenagers. Any poor burglar who had actually attempted anything . . . fortunately, they didn't prosecute children our age for crimes against adults in those days).

Naturally, I didn't see any improvement. Especially as the babysitter tyranny had only been replaced by the democracy of Dukes of Hazard viewers.

What? Some of you _doubt_ the above?

I am shocked, shocked, do you hear me? Look, just picture good old Ellynne as a dyed in the wool cynic with black hair, fair skin, and a big nose and it will all come together (mind you, I suppose I can handle the complexion [no zits (not that I've had many lately, but it's the principle)!], but the nose thing I'm not so sure of. Still, a woman with this description and a small nose would be Snow White which, while it brings in an association with a cast of seven, isn't where I wanted to go [although we all know who Grumpy is, don't we? Unless he's the apple]).

Still not happening?

How about if I throw in 13 nieces and nephews? You know, one to guest star - er, visit each week? I could tell you all about the escapades of little Rashel - I mean Rachel and Roj - sorry, Rob, Jr.

Oh, never mind.

Ellynne ________________________________________________________________ GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO! Juno offers FREE or PREMIUM Internet access for less! Join Juno today! For your FREE software, visit: http://dl.www.juno.com/get/tagj.