In a message dated 3/6/01 9:13:05 PM Eastern Standard Time, N.Faulkner@tesco.net writes:

<< I'd be interested to know why you felt the urge to say that, and especially in response to me, because I have never said that I consider sex to be 'nasty' and deserving of censure, and I have never said that because I do not believe it. You're jumping to conclusions and imbuing me with beliefs I simply do not hold.<<

Neil, you simply *have* to stop taking so many statements made in a public list debate as if they were personally directed toward you. The topic is porn. My comment was rather obviously directed toward the subject matter. No personal accusation was directed toward you, and no beliefs were attributed to you. Perhaps the sensitive nature of the subject is causing your reaction.

...

Where shall I put the gold star on your loose leaf paper?<<

Several places spring to mind, none of them on my loose leaf paper.<

Why, Neil! I do believe you've made a remark which some more sensitive souls would interpret as 'pornographic.'

...

No, I didn't take it that way, as I thought I had clarified earlier. Yes,

most human activity is 'unnatural' (which I pointed out myself). But from recognition of that there arises a body of opinion that promotes the 'natural' as superior and stakes a claim to superiority through pursuit of the 'natural'. <<

You are attributing a value judgement on the word 'natural' in this topic of discussion which does not exist. It was a mistake to assume that it was meant in a negative fashion, since that was not the intent in the context of the discussion. It was not a mistake to use it.

...

Therefore, to say that "If you stop having sex of any kind,

you are not behaving in a natural fashion" you run the risk of being associated with this elitist position (whether you personally subscribe to it or not) and hence arousing the ire of those who might feel they have been denigrated for behaving in this particular 'natural' fashion.<<

I understand your sensitivity on this issue, Neil, and I'm sorry you feel uncomfortable about a percieved value judgement on your lifestyle choice. It gives one perspective into the viewpoint of the gay individual under similar circumstances, doesn't it? There is an elite body of the population that labels them as 'unnatural' in a purely and deliberately negative context, and yet all sorts of biological examples can be cited to argue the 'naturalness' of their behavior. I apologize for inadvertantly making you feel uncomfortable.

...

Once again you seem to be either going off at a tangent or making very rash

assumptions about my own personal beliefs. I have never suggested that either sex or pornography are unnatural (in the derogatory sense) or evil, and I'm not sure anyone else on the Lyst has said that outright either. So why bandy these terms around in the first place?<<

Neil, this is a public discussion. Not every statement made relates directly to your response, or is directed toward you personally. Some of it is directed toward the arguments on this same topic by other individuals, inspired by issues you or I have raised. It's not all about you.

Leah