Dana wrote:

Yeah, but whoever told him or didn't tell him, POV Blake killing Travis (like eating oatmeal) is Just The Right Thing to Do.

(snip) ...well,

WHENEVER you have the chance to kill an implacable enemy who has been driven insane by a desire for vengeance on you... kill him!

OK, I know this must have been discussed many times over, but I wasn't on the Lyst then, so let this be my excuse.

Blake's explanation of why he refrains from killing Travis, "You don't matter enough to kill", is not just an assessment of Travis's importance in the general scheme of things. It is also a statement implying Blake's own state of mind.

As Blake's own great-great grandfather William surmised, we all start from the state of "innocence" when we perceive the world as basically good, positive and largely comprehensible. Sooner or later we "fall" from this original paradise into the state of experience which reveals to us a more complex, troublesome and disturbing understanding of the world and our own being.

In Blake's case, I am not referring only to his realization about the evil nature of the Federation. Blake is not just forced to face the horrors of the world around him. He is also forced to understand and experience the dark recesses of his own mind.

Blake is originally an idealist, someone whom we often see help people without any self-interest (think of Decimas, the crew of "Ortega", even the stuff in the Federation base in "Killer"). In some ideal circumstances, you could imagine that his predominant life philosophy would be what Boucher so cleverly ascribed to Blake clone: All life is linked, all life must have reverence. (Or, to quote W.B. again, Everything that lives is holy.)

OTOH, circumstances have forced him to kill, destroy lives, commit a great deal of "senseless killing and destruction". Blake may have started his rebel career as a peaceful opponent to the Federation. We don't have enough data about the Freedom Party, but we know, for instance, that none of the people Travis massacred was carrying a gun (remember that Blake had to grapple with a guard to get a weapon he used to shot Travis). We also recall Bran Foster's (ironic) final words, "Whatever the consequences we must not resort to violence". These two bitter lessons could have persuaded Blake that he *has* to resort to violence. There's no other way to defeat the Federation. However, it is a decision which cannot leave one's soul intact.

Another recognition which must be deeply disturbing for Blake is that not all of his motives for wanting to destroy the Federation are impeccable. Blake has suffered great personal wrongs which he cannot forgive or forget. Much as he tries to suppress his hatred, obsession, need for personal revenge, from his conscious attitude, he is still aware of these traits. Even if it's true, as Sally noticed, that Blake manages to stay emotionally detached from the violence he's committing, I think that all the while he has to fight certain darkness within, to grapple with his most negative urges.

The world around and within Our Hero is complex and filled with horrors. It's not just that the time is out of joint, it is also his own self which is out of joint, and the cursed spite is that he can't ever set these right. The whole world is an unweeded garden, and so is one's own psyche. It's not just that killing one man will not bring down the Federation. It's also that killing one man will not change or annihilate Blake's comprehension of the world and his own soul. Travis may be an embodiment of everything that's dark and base in Blake's own nature, but Blake knows you cannot simply chop off a portion of the self.

And kindly don't call Blake schmuck while I'm around.

N.